Sorry I haven't been updating much! I get distracted so easily!
Soon to come:
Stories of my batty old mother!
and
Teen Aged-Angst: Well this sucks.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Stories Of My Psycho Mother.
Lets face it, my whole family is crazy. All of us have our little quirks. But out of everyone in my family, my mother has to be the worst of them all. Some of the things she does and says are just well, for lack of a better word, RETARDED. I swear, sometimes the only reaction is just "what the fuck?!" Here is just a sample of what shes like:
Recently, my family has gotten new, extremely comfy couches. So, like anyone would, I like to sit on them. One day i am just sitting on the couch with one leg under me (its just how i sit normally, i cant help it) and my mom walks in and says
"Josie, what are you doing?"
"Uhm, I'm sitting mom, what does it look like?"
"YOU CANT SIT ON THE COUCH LIKE THAT ITS BRAND NEW AND YOUR GONNA MESS IT UP!"
".. o.o .. how am I supposed to sit?, i cant help it!"
"Not like that! these new couches are gonna get messed up because of the way you sit!"
I'm not even over exaggerating.
Another time, a few years ago, before my best friends Kayla and Taylor moved out to "Never Never Land" I came home from their house to pick up some things and go stay over their house for the night. I gather my things together and walk into the living room. I see my mother trying to fix the VCR. I look at her and say
"Hey ma, what are you doing?"
"the VCR is "getting jiggy with it" and i don't know what to do."
"Wha?"
"The picture is all messed up and i cant fix it!"
::sigh:: "Mom, no, j-just, wow. Uh that's not what "jiggy" means ma"
"Really?!"
I swear on my life, that really happened.
Just recently, I was working on a drawing that i am copying from a picture. I decided not to print the picture out to save paper and what not so I looked at it on the computer while working. I was almost done with the picture, all i had to do was shade it, when i decided to ask my mom weather my drawing resembled the picture. I walk into the office with my drawing book, and my laptop, place it down and say,
"Mom, can you look at this picture I'm drawing and tell me if it looks like the actual thing"
"Sure! It looks good. Accept the face looks a little big right here"
"Yeah see all the shading i have to do that and then it ll look the same"
"Oh, okay. How are you doing that on photoshop?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Th picture, are you using Paint to make it or something?"
"Mom, the drawing is MY drawing, not the one oh the computer!"
"OH"
.... wow.
----
More Stories will be out soon!
Recently, my family has gotten new, extremely comfy couches. So, like anyone would, I like to sit on them. One day i am just sitting on the couch with one leg under me (its just how i sit normally, i cant help it) and my mom walks in and says
"Josie, what are you doing?"
"Uhm, I'm sitting mom, what does it look like?"
"YOU CANT SIT ON THE COUCH LIKE THAT ITS BRAND NEW AND YOUR GONNA MESS IT UP!"
".. o.o .. how am I supposed to sit?, i cant help it!"
"Not like that! these new couches are gonna get messed up because of the way you sit!"
I'm not even over exaggerating.
Another time, a few years ago, before my best friends Kayla and Taylor moved out to "Never Never Land" I came home from their house to pick up some things and go stay over their house for the night. I gather my things together and walk into the living room. I see my mother trying to fix the VCR. I look at her and say
"Hey ma, what are you doing?"
"the VCR is "getting jiggy with it" and i don't know what to do."
"Wha?"
"The picture is all messed up and i cant fix it!"
::sigh:: "Mom, no, j-just, wow. Uh that's not what "jiggy" means ma"
"Really?!"
I swear on my life, that really happened.
Just recently, I was working on a drawing that i am copying from a picture. I decided not to print the picture out to save paper and what not so I looked at it on the computer while working. I was almost done with the picture, all i had to do was shade it, when i decided to ask my mom weather my drawing resembled the picture. I walk into the office with my drawing book, and my laptop, place it down and say,
"Mom, can you look at this picture I'm drawing and tell me if it looks like the actual thing"
"Sure! It looks good. Accept the face looks a little big right here"
"Yeah see all the shading i have to do that and then it ll look the same"
"Oh, okay. How are you doing that on photoshop?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Th picture, are you using Paint to make it or something?"
"Mom, the drawing is MY drawing, not the one oh the computer!"
"OH"
.... wow.
----
More Stories will be out soon!
Monday, August 13, 2007
one big almost happy family
As you probably already realize by looking at Wendys blog, my family isnt the most normal. But really, who has one of those "picture perfect" families like in the 1950's?!.. pshh, nobody.
In my family i have my mom who can only be described as the "cleaning nazi" (my friends and i gave her this name) I seriously think my mom has come crazy OCD cleaning issues. On her breaks from work, she comes home and vaccums the house. every. single. day. i swear its so weird. Also we used to have a dog and she was a very sweet dog at first. So what does my mom do? SHE VACCUMS THE DOG! .. and ever since then my dog was never the same :(
Then theres my dad. Hes actually one of the normal ones. All he wants is to watch tv and coach baseball. Simple enough, right? I feel bad for him though, hes always getting nagged by my crazy mother.
There also is, as you know, Wendy. She has to be one of the coolest sisters ever (and im not saying that just becuase she reads. this haha) Seriously, shes great. I can actually hold a conversation with her without haveing to gouge my eyes out with a spork. Whenever i mention a sister in convesation with my friends they say "Wait the cool one or the other one" haha. Its so funny.
Last, there is my sister Christine. Oh god, what a piece of work this one is. I swear she is EXACTLY like my mother, which is why i totally think my mother likes her best. Shes so annoying and tries to act like shes my mother.. pssh whatever man. Get over yourself.
Well just a briefing on my family. I will have many "cracktastic" stories about them soon :]
- Josie Blackheart loves you
In my family i have my mom who can only be described as the "cleaning nazi" (my friends and i gave her this name) I seriously think my mom has come crazy OCD cleaning issues. On her breaks from work, she comes home and vaccums the house. every. single. day. i swear its so weird. Also we used to have a dog and she was a very sweet dog at first. So what does my mom do? SHE VACCUMS THE DOG! .. and ever since then my dog was never the same :(
Then theres my dad. Hes actually one of the normal ones. All he wants is to watch tv and coach baseball. Simple enough, right? I feel bad for him though, hes always getting nagged by my crazy mother.
There also is, as you know, Wendy. She has to be one of the coolest sisters ever (and im not saying that just becuase she reads. this haha) Seriously, shes great. I can actually hold a conversation with her without haveing to gouge my eyes out with a spork. Whenever i mention a sister in convesation with my friends they say "Wait the cool one or the other one" haha. Its so funny.
Last, there is my sister Christine. Oh god, what a piece of work this one is. I swear she is EXACTLY like my mother, which is why i totally think my mother likes her best. Shes so annoying and tries to act like shes my mother.. pssh whatever man. Get over yourself.
Well just a briefing on my family. I will have many "cracktastic" stories about them soon :]
- Josie Blackheart loves you
Monday, August 6, 2007
hello everyone! ^^
Hi im Josie! My sister, Wendy and I were talking one day and we were discussing her blog. She suggested that I also start a blog so, here I am! Im new to this whole blogspot thing so please bear with me !!
^^
^^
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